These days, my little man has been so possessive towards me that it is almost impossible to escape from his sight before and after work. Thankfully, he is absolutely fine when I bid him goodbye in the morning to go to work. It’s a different story altogether once I’m back to fetch him. In other words, he just simply loves looking at my butt and will tag along wherever I go. Pretty amusing actually. Like how when I’m in the bathroom, he’d knock so hard on the door, demanding “Ibu…Ibu!” it’s as if he did not just see me a few seconds ago.
While it tickles me silly sometimes to know that he is that in love with me, the other part of me of course feels a wee bit sad. My heart still aches all the time when I’m at work. How not to, right? As it is, I’ve already tasted the life of being a stay-at-home-mum once and I remember how fabulous it was to wake up to my baby in the morning, not having to be sucked into the morning rush. How I would just savour every second with him. It was really a beautiful 8 months.
We did everything together. We bathed together, we ate together, we played together…and the list goes on. Just thinking about it makes me so happy already.
I told the mister that I would love to revisit that role again in the future, insya’Allah. He, of course, agrees with me 110% (in fact, he was also sad that I chose to go back to work in a way as he always loved the idea of me being a homemaker, taking care of our kids 24/7) but for now, responsibilities do not permit unfortunately.
I may not have such luxury anymore, but I am still grateful to have a job that I’ve always wanted since graduation. Allah swt is the best of planners as usual and I am doubtless that while my rezeki may not be in the form of being a homemaker now, He ultimately knows what is best for us.