Hush Hush

2012 is an amazing, amazing year. Full of love, happiness, sweet surprises and everything nice. I loved 2012 and I know I’ll love 2013 as well. In shaa Allah. So here goes, the first backdated entry of my pregnancy! :’)

I have a little secret. A happy secret.

With all praises to Allah, I have a teeny weeny being growing inside of me now. It’s the 22 October today and if my Mathematics does not fail me, I should be 5 weeks pregnant. I have been smiling to myself lately since I got to know about it. Sadiq pats my tummy gently every now and then (it’s his way of saying hello, how adorable) and frequently asks me how big our baby is.

Right now, as I am typing this, it is probably the size of a sesame seed. Coincidental that I have been eating red bean buns the past few days and each time I see the sesame seeds, I chuckle to myself.

So… Let’s backtrack to THE day. I speculated that I would get my period around mid month or slightly earlier. My menstrual cycle is pretty consistent so as days passed by, I prayed a little more that my ‘down under’ would stay clean (hehe) so I was happy that it actually did! Until one night where it gave us mixed signals. Had very slight bleeding so I thought oh, not yet. Felt a little down but I knew that He knows best so I was pretty much okay after Sadiq also comforted me.

But but, the next day there was nothing as well. So strange because usually I would have some slight spotting on my first day. Did not use a pad the following day and that was a huge risk to take because my second day would usually be crazily heavy. But nope, nothing.

I remember all the what ifs going through my mind and when I broke the news to Sadiq, he insisted on getting a pregnancy kit that night. We were out late at night collecting something from a friend and most pharmacies were already closed by then. We actually stopped at a petrol kiosk and I went in first wanting to purchase it but I didn’t see any (and I really looked everywhere). Came back to the car with no kit in hand but Sadiq was not convinced, saying that he had seen it being sold at petrol kiosks before. He went in instead and ta-da! next thing I knew he came back with a kit.

Got home when it was about to midnight. Half of me thought we should postpone to tomorrow morning instead since who knows maybe my hormones are not all activated yet (haha) but my husband, who was probably much more excited than I was, urged me to do it that night itself.

So… While everyone else was asleep, we sneaked into the bathroom and did the thingamagic.

Two lines would indicate a positive result. A negative result would mean that there is only one line.

And we got ………….one and a half! Hahahaha. That was an errrrr moment there because I remember the both of us looking at each other with thought bubbles on our head, “Pregnant or not eh?” We read further and concluded that I most likely was since if I was not, there would be no half a line, etc. We could keep the kit as a momento (this part a bit funny because my pee kinda overshot and so my dearest husband nicely helped to clean that part :p) and so we did!

Decided to buy more kits the next day to double confirm but based on the results, we were definitely convinced that I had a little being growing in me. 😀

I remember how we hugged each other tightly that night. I remember squealing. Smiling so widely. I wanted to scream and shout for joy (but cannot la, if not everyone will wake up hehe). Truly blessed, the both of us. We did not have to wait long for this wonderful moment to happen and as much as we planned not to plan for a child, we know that we can only hope for this to happen. Definitely very grateful to be bestowed with such a precious gift by Him.

We have not told anyone yet about this, not even our parents because we wanted to go to a GP to further confirm the results. Might be going today so yeyyy who knows today might just be the day that we break the happy news to my family! Insya’Allah.